My sister called. A distant aunt with whom we shared our childhood days has lost her son.
“This is the second one she is losing,” my sister added.
I jump out of my seat. I remember only the eldest one, whom, of course, I have not seen since our lives drifted apart after primary school. I went to a boarding school but our parents (our fathers were second cousins) worked in the same department for few more years.
In recent time, occasionally, I met my aunt but saw none of her children. Besides, my uncle passed away ten years ago and that further widened our relationship.
I asked for more information on how my distant cousins did with their lives. I was told only one has a stable job. That too a low-level one. None of them completed school. And three of them (two deceased now) were doing some odd jobs, regularly getting into problems of all kinds.
After I put my phone down my heart sank and for days I was depressed.
“Why is life so unfair? Both my uncle and aunt were not bad people,” I started asking questions I had no answers to.
We (my distant cousins) started our lives together. Same school. Same teacher. Went barefoot and hungry together. In fact they were a little better off for some reason. And yet they are where they are and we (my siblings) are where we are.
They too had dreams. I remember vividly that one wanted to become a pilot like me.
Moral of the story.
If you see someone doing odd jobs, or in some low-key positions or places, treat them well. Know that they too had dreams. They too would have loved to become successful like you – whatever success meant.
Check on your relatives, and your classmates. I know I am terrible at keeping in touch. It is my weakest link with relationships. I mean no malice, though. But one thing, I treat my classmates like I always used to. We still call each other by nicknames. No protocols or no social distancing.
Not everyone has made it although you may have started out together. It’s not their fault. I don’t know what it is. Simply, disadvantaged?
(NB – I am helping my aunt financially since death is also expensive these days)
I just read an old article on Tenzing Norgay on New Yorker. Tenzing is one of the first humans to reach the Peak of Mt. Everest. The link is given below.
An article like this one on Jigme Palden Dorji would be nice, rather than obsess over who was “first” to reach the summit of Mt. Everest. An indepth piece on his inner and the outer journey.
For, a feat such as climbing Everest, or venturing into the unknown, is intimately personal – and rarely about the prize, or recognition. Something must have pulled, or pushed, our young Jigme there. Such a story would be inspiring and worth a read.
Tenzing Norgay, as the article says, wanted to climb Everest because a monk had once told him that Buddha lived on top of Mt. Everest. A devout Buddhist he felt the pull and made an offering when he finally got up there. The other reason is that he grew up near Mt Everest and saw Swiss expedition try and fail to summit it. So, as a boy, he vowed to everyone that he would go up there, or die.
The other relevant point that the article highlights is that while he was lauded and decorated in other countries, he faced jeolousy and envy among his own people. Sounds familiar?
Congrats to our young army officer, Jigme Palden, for dragging himself to the peak of Mt. Everest. I say “dragging” because everyone who has been above 5,000 meters will know that it is no more a casual walk after that altitude.
I was joking that the highest point I have been to in my life was 5,300 and with an extra shot of whisky I felt I was on the top of the world. What a feeling it was!
Jokes aside, first, Jigme’s personal achievement is not just about him. His achievement is a reminder, and inspiration, to our youth that there are still places to go, things to do and peaks to summit. It need not necessarily be another mountain, or the Moon, but could be the peaks of science and technology, of business and innovations, or art and music, and films or farming, and many more.
In a country where strong socio-cultural norms and the perceived limited opportunities make you feel constricted, young Jigme (I think he was my daughter’s schoolmate) is a reminder of the immense possibilities and potentials that the world offers and that one should not be holed up in the excuses provided by the society around you and the authorities above you. It is an example of having a dream and pursuing with with determination.
It is about thinking beyond the normal, routine and the acceptable. Nothing great has been achieved by humanity without challenging all the above.
Second, and most importantly, it is about challenging yourself – to wake up early, train hard, work late, put your heads down and keep going.
“You don’t conquer the peak. You conquer yourself”, a seasoned mountaineer once told me long time back. It is not about reaching the summit. It is about knowing yourself, where you can get, what you can do, and who you are at the deepest level – because only when you push yourself to the extreme you know what you are. This is perhaps a person’s biggest achievement in life. Once you figure this out, the rest will follow.
I join the nation in celebrating this proud moment of his achievement and in wishing for a wonderful life ahead of him with more “peaks” to conquer.
May the spirits of your ancestors, and the dharma protectors of this small great nation be with you.
So, it is not just me who is nauseated by this committee thing for every decision to be made in this country – especially with the over-emphasis on it. (See my earlier post)
Well, to share my own experience I have always believed in the old Bhutanese adage – consult others but decide for yourself. In much of what I do at personal – and at professional level, this old wisdom has been my modus operandi.
Sure, it has got me into trouble. I was slapped with 141 audit memos when I led the Bhutan TV project in 1999 (my promotion was held for several years because of these). At work, my colleagues were often caught off-guard when they found themselves lagging behind me. This attracted, and attracts, a lot of envies and jealousies. But never mind. Nothing lasts anyway.
There is one thing one must remember, though: And that is, never to do anything with greed, hatred or self-interest. If you leave those out, the universe will ultimately find you honest and innocent – no matter what you do or how you do. And you will have no skeletrons to hide in your cupboard. You can age with a smile and with a pure heart – a clean chit, with tens of achievements on your cap.
And so is life..
Time does not wait for anyone. As my good friend, blogger Yeshey Dorji, says: the world does not wait for Bhutan.
In life, if you get entangled with what others might say or think, you will age regardless, and soon it will be time for you to pack your belongings and vacate place. No one owns the job one has. Don’t make it too personal. Rather, do what is best for the job – not for yourself.
For those in leadership positions or in a place of power or privileges, cherish it! You are the Chosen One. But don’t waste the opportunity by playing safe, or by playing dirty – or by the holding back the best of yourself. Because when you go – and you will go one day, you want to go with a style, not with regrets and remorse. You should the proudest of yourself when you eventually retire.
The choice, of course, is yours.
By the way, the iconic Taktshang was not built by a committee. 😁😁😁
So I needed a few used patangs – ceremonial swords worn by decorated officials. I needed for my next project – another religious construction. After a few direct enquiries with people I knew, which bore no results, I posted my request on Facebook.
And to my surprise, a kind lady, who doesn’t want to be named, responded. Let’s call her Golden Heart. Golden Heart mentioned that she had in fact three patangs and a few karbas (Sharchop word for ladle). She said if they were fine for my project, I could have them. She called me immediately to get my home address.
“Do you want to know how I got those patangs?” she asked.
“I was walking along Thimphu street and I found an old woman in a scorching Sun selling them on the sidewalk,” she said. She decided then and there to buy all the goods although she had absolutely no use of them. She felt sorry that someone that old had to sit under the burning Sun to make ends meet.
“I felt so pity for her,” she added. “The old lady told me that her husband finds old patangs and restores them and sells them. And with the money they earn they survive.”
The karbas came from other rural salesman and were also bought out of sympathy.
What also struck me about Golden Heart is that she comes from the Lhotsham community, who are predominantly Hindu. Who would have thought? And how inspiring is it for me that my works get resonated beyond my own religious fraternity.
More than her religious faith, however, I learnt through our call that Golden Heart is driven by kindness and simplicity. Although she lives on a small pension and is currently broke, while undergoing a long medical treatment she refused any money from me.
To be honest, I am often discouraged by the bureaucratic roadblocks I have to encounter even when I am doing something good for some distant community, or for the nation. However, it is ordinary people like our Golden Heart, their support and simplicity and their words of encouragement that keep me going.
Thank you, Golden Heart. May you be blessed with speedy recovery and a long life. The world needs more of you.
May 2, 2024 – I drove to Athang Rukha to attend the last day of the Mani Dungdrup – organized by a certain Lama Wangdi from Punakha.
I had mainly pushed myself there, despite my heavy schedule, for one reason – the Rukha Lama Ugyen Tshering and seven men and women came and worked tirelessly in the heat of Gelephu to organise the Sacho Bumter for Dorje Phagmo Center the week earlier. I intended to reciprocate their favour, quickly pay respects to Palden Lhamo and Avalokiteshvara and turn back. So, it was just another trip for me. I have been doing this for 18 years now.
The Arrival
However, this time the Rukha Lama had other plans. The villagers were told to receive me with full honors of a VIP-Lama or whatever. So, to my great embarrassment I was received with the blaring sounds of dung-jaling (Tibetan religious horns and trumpets) and ladies singing as they led me in procession to the temple.
At the venue, the jing-ser ritual was going on and the Presiding Lama, Venerable Wangdi – the former Lam Neten of Tsirang, signaled me to my seat.
When the ceremony was over he explained the significance of the Jing-Ser ceremony to the people, and also acknowledged my arrival.
“We have not met before. So I am honored to meet you in person. The locals here speak very highly of you,” Lam Wangdi told me as he turned to me.
He continued, “Almost nine years back I accidentally discovered this sacred abode of Palden Lhamo, but with no religious events whatsoever. So, I initiated and we did four editions of Mani Dungdrub from 2016 to 2019. I was told you were living abroad then. Then, Covid struck and this is the first one since normal life resumed”.
In 2015, Lam Wangdi, who was then the Lam Neten (District Abbot) of Tsirang Dratshang, was invited to preside over a death ritual in the first village of the valley. While there, he was told that a Palden Lhamo temple was newly built further up in the valley. He felt pulled by some mysterious forces and one day, accompanied by his two attendants, he trekked up to Rukha. He was so mesmerized by the place that he vowed to initiate a Mani Dundrub (Million recitation of Avalokiteshvara mantra) for three years.
He turned to me again, “These people even didn’t know what Mani Dungdrub was, forget about having the religious items to conduct one. I had to carry everything on my back,” he told me. “Now, to see all these temples that you have built, the sacred statues you have put, and a resident lama posted here, it all makes me very emotional. So, I told people before you arrived, “Take good care of this man. Follow whatever he says. Do not let him ever leave this valley. He is a very special person.”. I hope you will continue to support this valley. If you need me, I will come and join you till my last breath”.
I was humbled by his offer. And I felt that he too was drawn here like me by some distant karma from our past lives. He is from Punakha and I am from Trashigang.
The Celebration:
The day continued with celebrating the Birth Anniversary of the Third King of Bhutan, a solemn tribute. This was followed by lunch.
In the afternoon before the Chenrizig Ku-Sung-Thug Wang, which required rest of the day, the Support Committee for Rukha Temple was launched with me as the unanimously-elected Chairman and 45 founding members. Blessing the initiative, Lama Wangdi remarked again to say how proud he was to see the youth of Rukha taking charge of the future of Palden Lhamo Temple.
“Many years back when I first landed here I made a little wish – that the Buddha Dharma flourish from this abode of Palden Lhamo. With the compassionate work of our khenpo (Dr. in Dzongkha) Dorji Wangchuk, and your own good fortune and hard work, I have been telling myself that the wish of this old useless man has been granted. Furthermore, today when you – the young people, informed me that you were launching this Committee to continue the works of khenpo and mine, I told myself that I can die as a happy man because you embody the wishes of our King and of His Holiness Je Khenpo”.
He continued, “Before I came, I was telling myself that this would be my last time because I am not young anymore. I am 72. But now, I have decided to make another wish and that is – before I die I will offer a Rigsum Gonpo (Chenrizig-Jamyang-Chana Dorje) Thongdrel to this sacred place”.
The day ended and dinner was served. I decided to take leave of my new-found friend and before I left, I asked him,
“Lama, did you say that you will initiate the Thongdrel for this temple here?”.
“Yes,” he replied.
“Well, then, I would like to commit Nu. 100,000 from my side for the thongdrel. Let me know when you need the money.”
He was very pleased. “That makes my work easy. I will match your offer with 100,000, and find the rest,” he replied. “So, I was right. You are really something. I don’t know what”.
We both laughed. And wished each other goodbye with a vow that we would continue to work for the valley and for Buddha Dharma.
Leaving Rukha:
As I drove back, alone, along the narrow dirt road towards Wangdue-Tsirang highway my mind always takes me to different moments in the 17 years I have frequented this valley – some sweet, some scary and many of friendship, laughter and selflessness. Like the lama, I too made a prayer when I first landed here in 2007:
“And that whatever was left of my life would be dedicated to uplift this godforsaken community to show them the path to a better future.”
I am glad that 17 years later we are way ahead of that simple moelam.
Some backgrounders
– Rukha is one of the few abodes of Palden Lhamo in the country. While there are sacred chambers dedicated to her, there are only few places in Bhutan that can claim as her abode. Rukha is one of them. The site was blessed by Guru Rimpoche and Pema Lingpa (on his way from Bumthang looking for the site that would later become Gangtey Gonpa)
– Lam Wangdi currently serves as resident lama of Dho-Jagar Lam temple in Punakha. When he comes to Rukha for mani dungdrub he brings everything that is needed for the event – butter lamps, prayer flags, khadar, chadri items, incense sticks, flour to make ritual cakes, etc. The local contribute what they produce – rice, and some butter
I don’t chew doma (betel nut) but in the freezing temperature of Thimphu dawn, I drove past an elderly woman who was selling it. She said she was feeding her family by doing this. I bought her whole stock.
So, what did I do with all the doma?
Many years back I called my lama, Dorje Phagmo, and asked her to protect me as I undertook one of my endless road trips across the country.
“Do you ever notice the road workers and their children along the highway?” She said. “Take some doma, and juice and biscuits for them. Their gratitude and happiness will be greater than my prayers. You will have a safe journey”.
Now, every time I hit the road, I buy a few cartoon of packaged juice, biscuits, candies and doma (betel nuts) and I stop and say hello to those people who are making my trips safe and successful.
This is where the whole stock of doma I bought yesterday from the elderly lady went – to the people working on the road.
You can’t hit two birds with one stone. You can hit many 🥰🥰🥰
I returned from Gelephu after organising the Sacho Bumter ceremony for my lama, Khandro Dorje Phagmo, who is the highest female Rimpoche in Tibetan Buddhism. It was for the proposed site of the southern branch for Ngajur Pemachopheling Monastery – based in Zhemgang.
As a part of the ceremony, Riwo Sangchoe rituals and Tshogkor were also conducted to appease the local deities and offer gratitude to the divine – for the success of the project as well as for the Big Vision of our King.
On the request of the public of Serzhong a Thangtong Tshe-wang (long life blessing of Thangtong Gyalpo) was conferred to the people. This, by the way, made me extremely happy and emotional to see the authentic happiness of the simple folks – mainly people from my own ethnic group who were resettled in this area.
The idea to have a monastic centre there was conceived some years back by Khandrola to keep the old and sick nuns during winter. The idea gained traction after Gelephu was decreed as the mindfulness city based on Vajrayana ideals and philosophy. Hence, to align with the Royal Vision, the Dharma centre will not only be a nunnery, or a monastery, but more significantly, it will also accommodate a center for traditional wisdom and mindfulness, which I will be directing.
Much will, of course, now depend on the support and encouragement it receives from the Mindfulness City project and from the local communities, as this is not a commercial venture for personal benefits, but for the collective peace and prosperity of the country, and for the benefit for all sentient beings.
While this initiative overwhelms me, for now, I feel deeply deeply honoured and humbled to be a small part of both the visions.
For the ceremony we were joined by my small group of friends from Abroad, who travelled from all over the world. I also received full support from my good friends from Athang Rukha, who came in droves to see that the ceremony in the jungles of Gelephu is pulled through. It was not easy for everyone with the heat and insects and with nothing available in the vicinity.
(I was also surprised to see many people from Lhotsham community coming to receive the blessing. They explained to me that Varahi is an important Hindu deity too. In Buddhism Dorje Phagmo is Vajra Varahi)
I spent my Saturday afternoon joined by four like-minded individuals (our goodwill ambassadors) to help the Bhutan Stroke Foundation achieve its goal of raising the Nu. 4 million Endowment Fund by October 2024. This is required by a recent government directive to all the CSOs in the country. If the goal is not achieved the foundation might have to close. But closing is absolutely not an option for now. On the other hand, I suggested to BSF to take this new requirement as an opportunity to work towards the sustainability of the foundation.
We must let this foundation continue their work. This is because everyday, there are several cases of our own people getting hit by brain stroke – of different magnitude – somewhere in the country. While stroke is terrible for just anybody, for the less affluent section of the population it is a huge burden on the family – financially as well as in terms of after-stroke care. One person who is recovering confided to me that seeing his wife struggle taking care of him, he wished many times that the stroke should have actually killed him instantly. How sad can one be to wish for one’s own death?
The Bhutan Stroke Foundation takes care of such people. True, we have a free medical service in the country but stroke leaves behind different types of devastation and aftermath, some of which are unthinkable, and for which the State and our medical system cannot attend to every such case. This is where NGOs and citizens can come together and help. Hence, I would like to invite all my friends to make your donations – no matter how humble, and indicate it to the secretariat that it is the Endowment Fund. I also have one additional request, and that is when you send your donation send it with a prayer that it helps as many sentient beings while also wishing that no one in your family or circle of friends get hit by such a malicious condition.
(By the way, I have made my donation to the Fund when I accepted to become a board member. My grandson’s birthday is coming up soon and I will be making another donation in his name (we always donate instead of celebrating birthdays), and for the good health and happiness of my family – and my large tribe – with a moelam that no human being go through such a terrible malice)
Jarogang Temple is located in the village by the same name. It is in Athang gewog – and one can see it perched on the hill across the river, when driving along Wangdue-Tsirang highway and when you reach around Kamichu.
Jarogang takes its name from Legon Jarog Dongchen – one of the three supreme protectors of Bhutan. This deity together with Yeshey Gonpo (Mahakala) and Palden Lhamo (Sridevi) make up the trinity of protector deities for Bhutan as established by Zhabdrung Ngawang Namgyel (1594-1651).
During the Second Tibetan invasion in 1934, Semtokha Dzong was captured and occupied. Zhabdrung Ngawang Namgyel felt that his presence in the country was causing too many troubles for his hosts and may lead to more deaths in his name. So he decided to leave for India – enroute to Ladakh where the King there, Senge Namgyel, had invited him. Like many of his predecessors Zhabdrung Ngawang Namgyel intended to go on a lifelong retreat to Mt. Kailash, which was then part of the Ladakhi Kingdom.
However, when he reached a stream after descending from Jarogang village, the deity Jarog Dongchen appeared to him and requested him to stay. The deity assured him that he would take care of the invaders. Zhabdrung, then, is believed to have returned to Jarogang and stayed in the house of Zomlha Chugmo (literally meaning Wealthy Lady of Zomlha). Few days later Zhabdrung again felt he was not only freeloading on the local people but also causing too much burden. He again set off only to be met with the deity at the same spot, who then informed the Zhabdrung that Semtokha Dzong has been razed down by a fire and all invaders have been killed. Zhabdrung named the small stream where he heard the news as Deychu – to indicate the stream where he received the good news. Zhabdrung returned to Jarogang and informed his hostess that he had decided to return to Chari.
The “kutsab” and the sacred relics of Zhabdrung
On the day of his departure, the hostess begged him to stay there and offered him the large house from where Zhabdrung could base his dharma activities. It is believed that Zhabdrung made two statues which resembled himself out of the rice dough and presented them to the hostess as his kutshab (representative). The statue, he promised, would carry the same sacredness of blessing as receiving it in person from him.
While one of the statues is still there today, the other is believed to have flown away and landed somewhere in Tsirang. No one knows about it. However, the people of lower Wangdue and Tsirangtoe believe that the area would have good harvest and all nine grains because somewhere there is this second statue “stuck on a tree”, according to the legend.
The other amazing relic (for me) is his phurpa (ritual dagger), which seems to be very powerful. There is also a conch, a bell and a cymbal, which were all gifted to the Zomlha Chugmo. There is also a small metal statue called kharsapani, which is also believed to be self-arisen (rangjung). Some sources say that there were more relics and belongings of Zhabdrung but were apparently taken to Lama Lhakhang in Wangdue Phodrang Dzong – and brought here when the new dzong was built to be used as nangten. Nevertheless, in my view, Jarogang Lhakhang still has the biggest collection of relics associated with Zhabdrung – making it a recommended pilgrimage destination for every Bhutanese – irrespective of the faith, sect, or religious affiliations. In fact Zhabdrung was the founding Father of Bhutan – besides being the emanation of Avalokiteshvara and Guru Rimpoche.
The trees of Jarogang
The visit to Jarogang is incomplete without visiting the jackfruit tree, which is believed to have grown out o a seed planted by Zhabdrung Ngawang Namgyel. Even today the lama and the monks of Jarogang make the offering of the first harvest to the Machen Lhakhang – where the mummified remains of Zhabdrung is preserved today (he was never cremated). This tradition has been continuing for over three hundred years now.
There is also a tall cypress tree below the temple, which is believed to have grown out of the Zhabdrung’s walking stick. Legend has it that with numerous wars and invasions, he doubted if his mission to establish a Drukpa state would be successful. Thus, he planted the walking stick and is supposed to have made a moelam (aspirational prayer) that if he were to succeed a tree would grow out of the stick.
(Triviality: The exteriors of Jarogang temple retains the mud color without getting the white lime wash. The folk theory is that the local deity of Uma demanded that Jarogang temple should not get a whitewash. In retaliation the deity of Jarogang demanded that Uma Gonpa won’t get a sertog (the rooftop pinnacle). So even today Jarogang temple is not whitewashed, and Uma Gonpa has no sertog)
Getting there
Along the Wangdue-Tsirang highway, before you reach Kamichu there is a cantilever bridge and on the other side of the bridge is marked as the headquarters of Jaypee construction company. Cross the bridge and drive for some two kilometers till you reach a diversion – marked with two signboards. To the left is to Jarogang, and to the right is Athang gewog office.
Dorji Wangchuk 