My earlier post on my life coming full circle attracted a lot of admiration, goodwill, and a few envies. I thank you all for that. I am also glad many young people were inspired that at a time when people struggle with making inroads with one career, I had three “successful” ones.

While my life seems to have been a breeze, it was actually far from it. I had my fair share of struggles and strain, often characterized by difficulties and injustices that seemed insurmountable at times. My own colleagues would snitch on me, people I recruited myself would betray me, and I had to leave organizations that I built with my own hands. I was ousted from making documentaries two weeks after I won an international award. The pain was real. The hardships, too.

Some of my career changes were my own choice, while others were forced upon me by people and circumstances. But one thing is for sure: I never sold my principles. My dignity may have been battered at one point, but my conscience is intact. This is not to say that I am perfect, but the beauty of being human is continuously working on your imperfections—just as courage is not the absence of fear, but your ability to work around it.

All in all, though, there is one thing that I want to stress upon—especially for our younger generation that is less resilient than us, the GenX. Take every moment—both good and bad—every struggle and every betrayal as a message from the universe trying to put you on your predestined path. And not as a punishment for your bad karma, or you as a victim.

Do not overthink or kick yourself for the damn luck. Don’t linger in there for more than what is necessary. We must always remember that we suffer more in our imagination than in reality. Likewise, when the going is great, do not celebrate for too long—otherwise failure will be at your door sooner than later. Keep moving quickly from both happiness and hardships.

So, coming to me, not because I am into spirituality, but somewhere along my life, and early on, I learned to take life as a package—of happy and not-so-happy moments. There is no such thing as good or bad when it comes to learning from it. Everything is an experience. Every experience is an opportunity to grow. And if you stop growing, you stop living.

Of course, I am not a Buddha. When things start crumbling around me, or when I feel betrayed, my first reaction obviously is anger and sadness. That is normal, but I quickly switch to: what is the universe trying to tell me? Is it time to move on? Yes, although moving away from the familiar feels scary. Most of the time, I really don’t know where I am going, but I keep going anyway.

And finally, I changed my career from engineering to filmmaking to media and public relations to communication scholarship. I now find myself having to do all of these—especially in the new project that I am leading. Maybe the universe was preparing me all along for this big assignment — through all the trials and tribulations, through becomings and unbecomings, and through all the people and phenomena I endured.

Maybe my life until now was just a warmup.

😎😎😎

My earlier post on my life coming full circle attracted a lot of admiration, goodwill, and a few envies. I thank you all for that. I am glad many young people were inspired that at a time when people struggle with making inroads to a career, I had three “successful” ones.

While my life seems to have been a breeze, it was actually far from it. I had my fair share of struggles and strain, often characterized by difficulties and injustices that seemed insurmountable at times. My own colleagues would snitch on me, people I recruited myself would betray me, and I had to leave organizations I built with my own hands. The pain was real. The hardships, too.

Some of the changes in my career were my own choices, and some were forced upon me by circumstances. But one thing is for sure: I refused to sell my principles. My dignity may have been battered, but my conscience is intact. This is not to say that I am perfect, but the beauty of life is continuously overcoming your imperfections. Courage is not the absence of fear but your ability to outweigh it.

All in all, though, there is one thing that I want to stress upon—especially for our younger generation that is less resilient than us, the GenX. Take every moment—both good and bad—every struggle, and every betrayal as a message from the universe trying to put you on your predestined path. And not as a punishment for your bad karma.

Do not overthink or kick yourself for the damn luck. Don’t linger there for more than what is necessary. We suffer more in our imagination than in reality. Likewise, when the going is great, do not celebrate for too long—otherwise the demon will be at your door if you do that. Keep moving quickly from both happiness and hardships.

So, coming to me, not because I am deeply spiritual, but somewhere along my life and early on, I learned to take life as a package—of good and bad, happy and sad. When people betrayed me, which is the worst thing in life, my reaction obviously was anger and sadness, but I would quickly move to: what is the universe trying to tell me? Is it time to move on or move away?

I changed my career from engineering to filmmaking to media and public relations to communication scholarship. I now find myself having to do all these in the new life I am living and the new project I am leading. Maybe the universe was preparing me all along for this—through trials and tribulations and through becomings and unbecomings.

I don’t know. Maybe my life until now was just a warmup.

Some 20+ years ago, I left the engineering and project management stuff after building BBS FM Radio and BBS TV. I must say I was a bit fed up with meetings and negotiations and fundraising, or dining with donors and contractors, and preparing GANTT charts and spreadsheets, although my organization (BBS) was benefiting.

I moved to documentary filmmaking and journalism. As a producer and filmmaker, I did some watchable documentaries and anchored my own talk shows on BBS TV. I introduced the talk-show culture on Bhutanese television. Before me, no one wanted to talk on the public media.

I also went on to collect a few prestigious international awards here and there before I was inducted as palace staff in 2009 to lead the communication and public relations. Glory days, indeed. Greatest honor.

After I was relieved from that role in 2013, I became an adjunct professor and also went back to school to study for another higher degree—in communication and social science this time, which included a heavy dose of cultural studies and Buddhism.

In 2022, I left my jet-setting life in Macau and the classrooms behind. I thought I was done with everything I had to do—made my fame and fortune, achieved what I had to achieve, and tasted both fun and failures. I retreated back to Bhutan to a quieter life of mantras and building some stupas and temples. Everyone was leaving. I chose to return.

One year back I was accidentally made the chairperson of an ambitious spiritual project in GMC—one of the 14 that received the Royal Decree.

To cut it short, I am now back to meetings and negotiations and fundraising and dining with donors and contractors and preparing GANTT charts and spreadsheets. And on the move again.

There is a line from the movie Kung Fu Panda that best describes my story.

“You meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it.”

In Buddhism, time is believed to be cyclical and not linear. It indeed seems to be that way. It is back to the future.

This is Yindhum Chorten in Dorje Phagmo Dratshang in Zhemgang.

A few years back I had put marbles around the stupa after a conversation with one of the resident nuns there, who is in a wheelchair. She has permanent birth defects.

During my recent trip there, however, as I was sitting on this spot and observing the people going around the stupa, I just realized how a simple innovation like putting flat tiles around a stupa can mean so much not just for the disabled but for the old too. How easy and pleasant it makes for the elderly to do their circumambulating.

One guy came up to me and told me how his father-in law loves going around this stupa because the floor is smooth. For those of us living in the cities such facilities are often taken for granted. In far flung places it is a luxury.

Doing good things does not necessarily mean you need lots of money, and you have to do great things. Great things are great, but not all can afford. Small and simple projects such as this, but meaningful, do not cost much and can give you an equally great sense of joy and fulfillment.

For those of my age who have had their share of fame and fortune and are seeking some greater meaning in their life (not those who are struggling still), all you need to develop is mindful seeing and observations, coupled with empathy and service to others. And to slow down with accumulating wealth and power and vying for more.

There are so many simply joy you can bring to the world.

Next project: to make the temple and the stupa wheelchair friendly.

Thanking all my online and offline friends for the heartwarming wishes on my birth anniversary. I was down with the flu to respond immediately. My frontal neocortex was shut off from endless sneezing that I could not think straight. So, here is a belated reflection as I almost hit a full zodiac cycle by the Bhutanese calendar.

Aging is a natural process where years get added to life. It is not in your hands. It happens regardless of all of us and to all of us. However, not everything needs to be left to time, fate, and nature. You have a choice too. You can add life to the years, as the cliché goes.

Let me share my own approach and experience. And by no means is this to sound condescending or moralizing.

Unfollow the script.

You see, just before the covid years, I had an inkling that something was off with the standard script of our life—the established conventions, the social norms, and the predetermined expectations. Covid-19 confirmed that feeling, with the lessons of impermanence being hammered on us by the sudden pandemic. I was on to completing my doctoral studies and take up a teaching position in a foreign university. But everything changed in an instant.

Ever since that, I don’t take anything for granted. I don’t wait for doing what needs to be done. If there is a meaningful project, I grab it and run with it. If there is a place to go, I don’t wait. If there is a person in distress, I try to help. Every year is an achievement. Every month is a blessing. Every day is a gift. Every moment is to be cherished.

One problem with following the convention is that you get deleted once your usefulness expires, such as reaching the so-called retirement age—a concept that is nonexistent in the traditional Bhutanese society but which became widespread with the introduction of the modernization era. Ten years back I had all these realizations.

No such thing as retiring.

Today when I travel, I meet my mates from my school and colleges and work colleagues who have mostly retired. This, I feel, is a huge scam we have fallen for. Retirement is a concept we borrowed from the Industrial Revolution, where you are disposed of once you are not strong enough. Worse still, you “delete” yourself. As a small country with a small productive workforce, this is a waste. Monks and farmers never retire.

I feel one should not stop working—especially the doctors, engineers, and teachers. Recently, when I was in Buli, I met one of my juniors from engineering college, who said he was retired. I told him that there is no such thing as retirement and that I want to see him in Gelephu for two to three months every year to help build the mindfulness city. There are a myriad of ways to give back to the country, king, and community. And lots of ways to add life to your years.

Fun facts about Gen X.

The thing is, my generation—Generation X, the generation that grew up eating WFP wheat supplies, the generation that got the first vaccinations, the generation that walked for days to get to a road, the generation that came from the School of Hard Knocks—will probably live longer than their parents. Past the age of 80 for sure if one leads a healthy life, and many may even cross 90. Now, that is a good 20+ years to operate on your own.

Sure, life is uncertain. But, again, this is something no one can do anything about. What you can do, instead, is to start thinking about how to fill those 20 years in the most meaningful ways that will make you proud and without having to check with the whims and fancies of your capricious boss and a judgmental society. You can move around more freely and make your own choices.

This, of course, is not to suggest abandoning one’s obligations and responsibilities, but an invitation to do what makes one truly happy and fulfilled without the boundaries set by the service rules and social pressures. In fact, a friend of mine once shared that he really felt he was serving the country better after he left the government job. His was the first hotel to offer itself as a quarantine station during Covid.

So, to all the people from GenX, keep going! You can still contribute to humanity; you can volunteer for one of the numerous spiritual monument projects in GMC, you can teach our Desuung and Gyalsung, or you can volunteer for any of the NGOs in the country. The opportunities are there.

For millennials and those born after.

The millennials! Because of all the constant distractions and intense lifestyle, you guys will age very fast. You are 17 one day and 47 in an instant. 30 years, gone! You will soon be in line at the exit door. Start thinking now about how best you can give life to your years. What greater meaning can you find? What difference can you make? How many lives have you changed? Is this life all that there is? You may be judged by the number of houses you own or the career you pursued and attained. But what will truly make you feel deeply satisfied inside is how many lives you have made a difference to and how many moods you have uplifted.

For Gen Z and Gen Alpha, there won’t be a script to follow, as the world you will live in will change so fast that you will be in the recycle bin more often than not. I will elaborate on this in my future articles.

Meanwhile, start adding life to your years as Mother Nature adds years to life.

🤩🤩🤩

NB: Starting the first day of the rest of my life by sending out school-going expenses for my beneficiaries 😇😇😇

(Photo – with His Eminence Sonam Gyatso (aka Abhum) Rimpoche, for whom I jumped at the privilege of showing him our country. He really liked the Tshering Chhegna circuit. He was a teacher to Dorje Phagmo Rimpoche when she studied in Mysore.

After my post on driving in India, here is a funny and not-so-funny side of driving in Bhutan – in the spirit of fairness and sportsmanship. Please add your #MaanKiBaat. But no hate speech, please. Only fun and some laughs allowed here.
😁😁😁

1. Indicator Rule.
   The right indicator ON can mean any of the following:

• I want to turn right.
• Don’t overtake.
• You can overtake.

1. Safe Distance Not Allowed.
   Don’t leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you. Otherwise, this space will be filled by at least a taxi and a truck, who are trying to gain milliseconds of arrival time.
2. No traffic light is a national pride.
   Either it is too advanced a technology to adopt, or we take pride in being romanticized that “Bhutan has no traffic signal.” Technology is there for a reason.
3. Some cars think they are trucks.
   If they want to turn right, they occupy the left lane and veer right. Vice versa, if they are going left, they turn right first. And trucks think they are cars. They try to enter a race competition with SUVs.
4. Confidence Overloaded.
   Pedestrians do zebra crossings as if they have divine rights. Maybe they have nine lives like cats.
5. The fast lane is Booked.
   It seems some drivers have paid the subscription fees to stay in the fast lane. So, you have to overtake them from the left.
6. Overtaking is an ego game.
   If you attempt to pass the car in front that is snailing, it will suddenly accelerate. If you are successful, you will be cursed or chased.
7. Honking Rule.
   One short beep to alert the car in front you are overtaking; three short beeps to say hello to your friend passing by; the longest and continuous beep to scream if someone is trying to kill you.
8. Some Entitled Lot.
   The more luxurious the car, the more the sense of entitlement one feels.
9. Thanks. No, Thanks.
   Don’t expect to get a thank you for the courtesy you extend, like waiting for them to pass or complete their maneuver.
10. Blind you!
    Prepared to be blinded at night by someone flicking at you to alert you of their presence.
11. Animal Surprise.
    Be careful when driving in rural areas and forested areas. Cows, goats, chicken, tigers, elephants, leopards, deer, monkeys, pheasants, and mongooses may pounce on the road from nowhere.
12. Almost Licensed.
    If you see a large letter “L” pasted on the rear windshield, it means the driver is “Learning.” Go near it at your own risk.
13. Acrobatic Spitting.
    If you see someone open the door and pop out their upper bust, don’t worry. It is not a suicide attempt. It is to spit out the betel nuts.
14. Let there be no light.
    Wonder why Bhutanese don’t switch on the light beam till it is pitch dark. Don’t be alarmed to meet many cars driving in the dark, after the sun has been long gone. 🤔🤔🤔

🥳🥳🥳

Stroke is a cruel disease. It is something I don’t wish for anyone. Once it hits, if it is not fatal, the recovery time is long, or the patient is disabled for life. Either way, the psycho-social and economic impact is huge on individuals and families, leading to depression and despair.

Post-stroke care and recovery is the key, and it is where the Foundation will have a new area of focus. We at the foundation are open to and are on the lookout for any solution to help our patients. And in this way, in Bhutan we are fortunate. Besides the medical services, we have traditional medicines, plus powerful Vajrayana rituals, and, finally, the blessings of our lamas and rimpoches.

Hence, one of the initiatives I proposed in the foundation was to request some of our rinpoches to be our spiritual patrons. Their role would be to bestow long life and medicine Buddha blessings regularly on our patients and the caregivers and the staff of the foundation.

Why Spiritual Patrons?

The Foundation is basically an organization that puts compassion into practice, and compassion and loving kindness are the core practices in Mahayana Buddhism. And who is the epitome of such practices? For me these three Rimpoches embody these values.

Furthermore, from my experience, when people are down, when all hope seems to be lost, and when desperation sets in, that’s when people turn to spirituality. Only our spiritual masters can lift them up. I can’t do that, and the doctors can’t do much either. And yet, the psychological effect is huge and leads to positive outcomes. A westerner, for whom I arranged a blessing, had his T cell miraculously increase and eventually recover from an almost fatal disease. Others even recovered from late-stage cancers after blessings, rituals, and prayers were conducted on their behalf.

Where science stops, spirituality will take over and help us find our way back to health, happiness, and hope.

Hence, we are super excited that all three rimpoches we approached—His Eminence Zuri Rinpoche, His Eminence Kathok Situ Rimpoche, and Her Eminence Dorje Phagmo Rimpoche—have accepted our request. Their compassion and blessings will go a long way in helping our patients and caregivers to wade through the challenges in the post-stroke period.

We are also hopeful that through their prayers, concerns, and blessings, there would be fewer people affected by this terrible disease.

This is the beauty of Bhutan.

Deepest gratitude to all three Rimpoches. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

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(Be involved. Be informed.)

Approximately 80% of strokes are preventable through lifestyle changes and management of risk factors.

Invite the team from BSF to do a professional risk assessment of your school, office, business, monastery, workplace, and family. Contact our office.

I drove from Gaya to Siliguri to Bhutan.
Here are some interesting observations, for fun:

1. Traffic rule is optional. Honking is mandatory.
2. Cows are king. Goats are deputy boss.
3. Everyone honks, but no one listens.
4. Nobody gives way to anybody. Everyone is equal.
5. Every space is a road. Or a parking.
6. Driving is taken like a serious contest. The tension of the faces is real.
7. Bigger the vehicle, more aggressive is the driver.
8. Trucks are dangerous. Chicken, even more.
9. Zebra crossing is a waste of paint.
10. Trucks are anchored on the fast lane – by default.

There are many good things too.

1. There is chaotic order, which is like our own life.
2. In over 3000 km in over a week, I saw only one trafic accident.
3. If you ask one person for direction, three show up to help you.
4. Some of the best drivers got be in India. They are safe and precise upto a few millimetre.
5. Trust the locals, not Google Map.
6. New highways are smooth and superb. Some are world-class.
7. Best part of road trips in India is having tea on clay cups for Rs.5. You get to keep the cups as souvenirs.
8. If you violate a traffic light, the locals are on your side.
9. If you are in trouble, whole village stops to help.
10. Finally, there is free non-stop entertainment, such as overloaded trucks, family of five plus maid on one bike smiling and waving at you, cars carrying mattresses and pipes on the carrier plus a passenger on top.

Recommendation:

Do a driving pilgrimage to India with your friends. The experience and the memories can be unforgettable. You will see the real soul of India among the simple village folks.

I just concluded the first leg of my pilgrimage of the eight sites associated with Buddha. Needless to say, it was a profound experience. Sitting and walking on the same soil as the Enlightened One was both a moving experience and a very fulfilling one.

However, there was one thing that bothered me – the constant pestering by petty vendors and beggars in every pilgrimage site. There were hundreds of men, women, and children – some old, some disabled, and many totally undernourished.

The suffering and the misery numbed me completely that I was simply overwhelmed and felt helpless. But to unsee such suffering is to undo any merit from the pilgrimage itself. What is the use of praying to Buddha while overlooking the very thing he was trying to bring an end to? So, I kept looking for an answer to my own dilemma.

On the fifth day while driving from Vaishali to Rajgir, I struck up a long conversation with my driver, Indradev, about the development in Bihar – nicer roads, better Internet connectivity than before. And we continued with his life, family, and children. We did a WhatsApp video call with them and I got introduced to his family – especially to his six-year-old son, who always tries to connect to different people from different countries his father drives around.

MY BUDDHA MOMENT.

During one of his subsequent calls, I overheard his son complain that the school wants to know when he will pay the fees. My newfound friend looked perturbed.

“Why is the school bullying your son for the fees?” I asked.

“Sir, I am behind by four months, and so the school is right to ask for it,” he replied.

He then went on to complain how life has been unfair to him since his father passed away and he didn’t get anything and even had to discontinue his school. He works every day for long hours to just feed his family.

He is currently squatting on someone’s land with a token lease. A kind Vietnamese pilgrim gave him some money to put up a proper roof, and a Tibetan Rimpoche from Dharamsala helped build a toilet. Both of them, however, have lost touch with him during covid-19. He added that this season has been low in tips, and his salary was just enough to buy the groceries.

“Sometimes I wonder if God exists and why he keeps me in an earthly hell forever,” he concluded with a sigh.

His voice was heavy, and the pain was real. I empathized with him, felt a deep sorrow because I know how he felt. I have been there too where I felt worthless.

“But I won’t deprive my son of what I missed. In fact I am sending him to a private school although it takes one fourth of my salary,” he said with conviction.

“How much is the monthly fee ?” I asked him.

“It is one thousand per month, sir,” he replied.

“So, that would be twelve thousand a year?”

“Right, Sir.”

“Ok. Call the school right away and tell them you will clear the dues by tomorrow when we get back to Bodhgaya. And tell them you won’t be late here after either, because I will pay the fees for the whole year.”

He went into disbelief but did it right away. When he put the phone away, he seemed relieved.

“You said God has abandoned you. I think he didn’t, whoever he or she is,” I told him.

He was visibly emotional.

“Thank you, Sir,” he said, looking towards the horizon with a teary eyes.

I looked out of the window and saw the mountains of the city of Rajgir getting closer. But it was not the words of the Buddha that came to my mind to describe what I just did. Instead, my favorite line from the movie Schindler’s List – a Hebrew proverb kept ringing:

He who saves one life, saves the world entire.

No! I can’t end all the suffering in the world. But, at least I just saved a child from being harassed for not paying the school fee on time. Maybe I saved him from having to drop out of his school. One never knows.

The next day when we got back to Bodhgaya, I relieved Indal to go and clear the dues with the school. He messaged me an hour later and texted me the receipt and the last exam results.

DID BUDDHA RECIPROCATE?

That evening in Bodhgaya after dinner, I rushed to get a few more rounds of the great Mahabodhi stupa. It was almost closing time.

When I entered the gate, I saw that a group of Thai, Vietnamese, Chinese and Indian devotees were saying their last prayers as the temple was about to close. I entered and joined in. It was a beautiful moment chanting the praises to Buddha in Pali.

Buddham Saranam Gacchami (I take Refuge in Buddha),
Dhammam Saranam Gacchami (I take Refuge in the Dharma),
Sangham Saranam Gacchami (I take Refuge in the Sangha).

Then as the security was ushering us all out at 9 o’clock, I saw the main priest, who was sitting on the altar near the Buddha, distributing scarfs and other flowers offered to the Buddha statue. I approached the priest too and asked him if I could have a white scarf too. He looked into my eyes, thought for a moment, and said,

“Wait!”

And he got up and took down a large yellow silk robe that was wrapped around the Buddha statue. He bundled it and launched it at me.

I caught it like a good goalkeeper and thanked him several times as I hurried to the door with the policemen screaming at me.

As the giant door closed behind me, I turned around and stood there for a moment to reconfirm the priceless gift I just received, slowly settling in, and absorbing the blessing for one last time.

And in that moment I realised that even my “God” has not abandoned me either. I would like to believe that he reciprocated on behalf of the child I just helped.

😌😌😌

(I decided to sponsor the child all the way till college, as long as he does well. ✌️✌️✌️

May this small act of kindness bring closer to ending suffering and misery on this earth.)

Info: Indradev drives for a tour company. Someday he dreams to own his own car. Right now his priority is buying the land he is on. Good to hire him and do the Buddha Circuit. Car is bit luxurious but better be safe.